Archive for March, 2008

>    There was a cowardly terrorist attack today in Jerusalem against high school age students.  Many died, many more injured.  It never ceases to amaze me that the most abhorrent and inhumane acts are carried out in the name of God.  As a Jew, my religion teaches me that God’s name is sacrosanct, even unpronounceable, for it harbors within It the incomprehensible power of Creation.  Creation is the act of bring forth Life.  So how is it possible that in It’s name what is rendered is the deliberate taking of Life?
    I am fond of saying that for every butterfly to be born, a caterpillar must die. This is the analogy I often voice when pessimists raise the specter of so much violence in the world. I try and remember that ultimately we are evolving toward a more conscious, more loving Being, we humans, and that a necessary component of evolution is the dying off of certain forms. And it helps to throw in a little physics and add that matter is neither created nor destroyed…but rather redistributed.  It helps when the discussion is theoretical. It’s of little consequence, and less solace, when children are massacred.
    I write every day with a single mindedness of purpose. That purpose is to find the highest meaning for all concerned. I pride myself on having the gift of being able to do just that, no matter what the occurrence. This entry challenges me to my core and I wonder, even as I write, if I can succeed this time.
    My agony is not because these were Jewish children, but because they were children. Whether these 9 innocents, or the children of Darfur, India, China, Gaza or Philadelphia…we must awaken to the Truth that to abandon the children is to bankrupt the future. We have become so hardened to violence is it’s many forms that these become just news stories without eliciting form us the agony and indignation that should rise up from our innermost Being and scream “No more…not on my watch.”
    To do nothing is to partake of human sacrifice. Let’s not delude ourselves that because there is no physical altar it is anything other than sacrifice. But for what are we sacrificing our children? What answer could possibly validate the question? Who are we to allow so much anger and hatred to fester that the lives of children have become expendable commodities to be traded in a war waged in the Name of God?  For we are allowing the hatred to  continue to fester and grow for so long as we do not demand of ourselves that we begin immediately to remove hated from our own lives.
    There is no “us” or “them.” There is no “other.”  There is only the full expression, as seen in an infinite number of possibilities, of the Pure Urge to Be All That It Is.  If evil exists it is separation. It is the illusion that what I do to you I do not also do to myself.  It is allowing hated to rise above compassion and stand as a guiding principle in the Name of God when God knows nothing of hatred…for it is humankind’s co-creation… and our least admirable one at that.
    There is only one way to redeem the lives of those high school age students in Jerusalem. Only on way to save the children everywhere whose lives are daily being devalued, abandoned, tortured, and enslaved. You and I have to say “enough.”  We have to circumcise our hardened hearts. W have to raise our voices to such a pitch that there will not be a corner of this Earth where one can escape our cry.
    And we must Be, in God’s Name, what God Is.
    Love.

P.S.   Remember to click here to download my FREE e-book “TOO MANY SECRETS”

>Fear has many faces, especially in personal relationships. Lately, I’ve been blessed by being able to unmask two of them and I ‘d like to share with you what I uncovered. As my regular readers know I am going through a divorce. Personally, I believe that every experience we have is filled with opportunities to learn important Life lessons. This divorce is no exception.
    What I’ve observed is that my husband and I each have our own brand of Fear that gets in the way of deeply connecting. My particular brand is the need to be right. At the end of the day, so to speak, or the end of a discussion…I have a tendency to make judgments and then to justify those judgments by scoring points in the “see I was right” category. When someone has to “win” there is no room for anyone else at the podium. When there’s no room for anyone else, you’re in it alone.
    I’m afraid to be wrong.
    Not exactly the point of entering into a relationship now, is it?
    My husband, on the other hand, simply cannot see the “moment” through to it’s natural conclusion…however long that moment may be. He only interacts to his pre-set comfort level and, past that point, he’s gone. Sometimes literally…but usually just emotionally.
    He’s afraid of intimacy.
    Not exactly the other point of entering into a relationship, either.
    So you’re thinking,”No wonder they’re getting divorced!” And perhaps you’re correct. But there’s a bigger issue here that goes beyond our relationship.
    It’s the willingness to embrace Life, and others, without pre-conditions, without judgment, and with a commitment to the integrity of the experience without having to control what that looks like or how long it takes.
    I was at the book store recently and observed that there are so many books being published on how to live in the moment, in the Now, that one can hardly keep up. But there’s a reason for this message spilling forth from almost ever direction. I think the single most important “discovery” of our time is the knowledge…wisdom, actually…that being fully present in the moment, and in who you are, while allowing others to do the same is the key to a fulfilling Life as well as to fulfilling your Life’s purpose.
    If there is one lesson I will begin the next phase of my life with, securely embedded in my heart, it is this knowing that judgment and control are two of the faces of Fear and when unmasked, reveal a more complete portrait of what Love looks like.
    I wish us both blessings on our continuing journeys…and I know you do as well.

P.S.   Remember to click here to download my FREE e-book “TOO MANY SECRETS”

>I’ve been doing a lot of radio interviews lately around the topic of drug abuse and attempted suicide, spurred by a recent CDC study on increased suicide rates among teenagers (up 8% after a 22% decline) and the ever-present stores about Heath Ledger, Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan and other famous people who seem unable to manage their successes and their fame, not to mention their lives.
    I’m some what of an “expert” on the topic of attempted suicide, having attempted it at age 23.
    While I’ve written about that previously, I was asked an interesting question today while being interviewed by Shelley Duffy of KDKA in Pittsburgh. Shelley asked me if I believed that I would have the same views about life that I have today had I not attempted suicide and survived it. My reply was that it’s a hypothetical question that I can never know the answer to. However, I continued by saying that I am eternally grateful for having survived it because every experience we have, and the meaning we bring to it, builds upon the others to shape us into Who We Are and how we approach life.
    As the day wore on, I kept going back to Shelley’s question. I began to think how often I hear people say they “regret” something they said or did and how often people want to forget the painful and difficulty of those times gone by. To the contrary, those times and experiences are the high octane fuel that drives us to new and exciting destinations along the Road of Life. Far from regretting them, we should embrace them and, when helpful, be willing to share them with others. For every experience, and it’s lesson learned, can become a guiding light to others in ways unimagined.
    For many years I did not speak publicly about my attempt. Then, recently, I spoke to 500 students at an area high school. It was very rewarding, as many students came and shared their feelings and expressed their gratitude after each class presentation.
    Then, a few nights ago, I was at the school again because my daughter was performing in the school play. As I was helping set up the refreshments for sale at intermission, two girls walked over to me and said, “Did you speak to us recently?” I had to stop and think for a moment for they caught me off guard. Then I said, “Are you sophomores?” When they replied that they were, I said, “Yes, I did speak to your class about a month ago.” The two of them then shared how they were inspired by my story and each thanked me for the courage to speak up. We exchanged a few more words and then went on our respective ways.
    From a purely selfish viewpoint, I cannot tell you how gratifying that encounter was. Here it was weeks after the presentation and they not only remembered me but needed to share how it had impacted them. From a more altruistic viewpoint, I am humbled by the many twists and turns my life has taken, some smooth…others rocky and painful…but all combined to bring me Here and Now where I can be of service by providing hope where it may be sorely, and temporarily, lacking.
    So, what if I had never attempted suicide?
    I’ll never know that answer and I don’t need to. I did attempt it and I did survive it. The meaning I bring to that experience is all that matters. For me, the meaning is that there are no accidents, there is purpose in everything, we need the patience to let that purpose unfold and when it does, to bravely step up and assume the role we were born to fulfill.
    No “what ifs” ands or buts.
P.S.   Remember to click here to download my FREE e-book “TOO MANY SECRETS”