Archive for February, 2008

>     I was recently in Barnes and Noble, doing what I often do, browsing. I just love walking through those aisles, lingering here and there to take in all that shared knowledge. What struck me during my most recent foray was the proliferation of titles that, in one way or another, proposed or promised direction in “Finding Your Life’s Purpose.”  Such books abound and so do their sales numbers.
    There are no accidents. I live by this belief.
    So the recent calling to all of these writers to develop the topic of finding one’s Life purpose indicates two truths: 1) a lot of people are being “guided” to disseminate a specific message at this time and, 2) a lot of people are ready for that message.
    Let’s explore the message, why it’s so important and why, until now,  it’s received so little attention.
    The message that each of us has a unique Life’s purpose implies that there’s a specific job that each of us is to perform in our lifetimes. If each of us has a job that can only be accomplished by that individual, then to not “show up” for that job is not only to miss the reason we are alive but also to leave unattended a necessary component in the ongoing process of evolution.
    Recently I spoke to a group of high school sophomores on the topic of depression and attempted suicide. I presented them with a history of my life including an attempted suicide 26 years ago. I showed them had I not survived that attempt and gone on in search of my Life’s purpose, I wouldn’t have been able to accomplish all of the remarkable things I’ve achieved since that time. Since each of those accomplishments was built upon the one that preceded it, all of them combined had brought me to be standing before them sharing my message. That speech…that day…before those specific children…was an appointment in My Life that I was able to keep because I have identified my Life’s Purpose.
    I spread Hope and Inspiration.
    Throughout the day, after my presentation to each class, several students would approach me with tears or heartfelt gratitude for my sharing the intimate details of my journey. My message to them was, and remains, that had I not survived and gone on to find My Life’s Purpose, I would not have been there to provide them with what they needed. When we don’t “show up” for our Life’s unique purpose, no one else does.
    And that makes all the difference in the world.
    Literally.
    Now that we know why it’s vital to find your Life’s purpose, how about examining why something so important has received so little press throughout the ages?
    I think the answer lies in the dark corners of the desire to power over and control others.
    If I know that I have been created by a Creator who has given me an indispensable assignment for which I am fully equipped to successfully complete, and that I am carrying within me seeds of that Creator’s energy, who or what would I defer to in making My Life’s decisions or in pursuit of My Life’s Purpose? No one and nothing.
    Such a conscious and awakened individual leaves no room for it’s manipulation by others or external events.
    Now, knowing that you have a unique Life purpose, and that the absence of that knowledge has been the source of all of your pain and suffering, you can go forward from this moment with the certainty that your job awaits your arrival. It’s compensation is incalculable in monetary terms but priceless in abundance of spirit. Your contribution, through your work is not to a 401(k) plan but rather to repair of the world’s suffering from the pain of separation. Your retirement will not be to Florida but to an eternally flowing river of Consciousness that nurtures All That Is and All That Ever Will Be. Such are the rewards of living You Life’s Purpose.
    To Thy Own Self Be True.
    I suspect Shakespeare knew exactly what he was talking about.

P.S.   Remember to click here to download my FREE e-book “TOO MANY SECRETS”

        >It’s a good time to recall the old adage that goes something like this: “90% of what we worry about never happens.” With the sub-prime mortgage market having gone south, consumer prices rising, two ongoing wars in Iraq and Afghanistan with both China and Iran developing nuclear weapons, and a whole host of other challenges closer to home in our daily lives…well…I know I could use the reminder. How about you?
   But let’s take it one step further. Let’s move beyond not worrying because “things worried about are not likely to occur”…to the next step of actually thinking, instead, about good things that likely are.
   Why? Because thoughts are things and dwelling on them, combined with the power of emotion behind those thoughts, is a sure-fire way to manifest those thoughts into action.
   Now I know that to many of you this concept is all New Age Spiritual Feel Good Who Ha. Mainly because you’ve tried it without result. You’ve thought about something positive. Perhaps some “thing” you’ve wanted to acquire or some event you’d like to occur…yet to no avail. You never got the “thing” and the occurrence never happened. And so, you write it all off as so much nonsense.
    But what if you actually did get the “thing” or have the occurrence… just not in the time frame you anticipated. You see, we all think that positive thought means instant gratification. And perhaps at some highly advanced application of the principle, with clear intention and lasered focus, it does. But for us ordinary folk, two things tend to get in the way of the results we seek.
    The first is Time. We assume that when we focus on wanting something and it does not immediately show up, well then, we and it have failed. However it’s necessary to leave some “wiggle room” for Time to close the gap between where you are and where the thing or event may be at the moment you call it forth.
    The second thing is doubt. When you focus your thoughts on what you want and it doesn’t immediately show up, you doubt both your ability and the process, withdrawing the focused energy from your goal. This withdrawal of focus effectively cancels out your intention, guaranteeing disappointment.
    So when you think about it, what really gets in our way is Us. With a little knowledge and even less faith in what we know, we self-sabotage where it is we want to go and what it is we want to accomplish.
    Rather than worry about the unlikely, or short circuit the possible, how about if we just keep our eye on the ball. The ball is the best we are capable of and certainty that we know how to Be It.
    If we have a choice today, and we always do, let’s choose to let go of the fear and disaster scenario and instead focus on how to See and Be the best of humankind.
    Oh, yes. As you practice this approach, remember to get out of your own way.
   

P.S.   Remember to click here to download my FREE e-book “TOO MANY SECRETS”

>    It’s a good day for justice. Mark Jensen, the Wisconsin husband convicted of poisoning his wife with anti-freeze then suffocating her to death was sentenced to life in prison without parole, and Bobby Cutts, Jr. the 30-year-old former Illinois police officer who killed his pregnant girlfriend was sentenced to life, as well, with the possibility of parole to be considered at age 60.
    The “lucky run” era of O.J. Simpson-like escapes from justice appears to be over. Which supports two of my basic beliefs: 1) there are no secrets and 2) the winds of profound change are in the air.
    Let’s look at these two beliefs a little more closely.
    There’s another story out today claiming that a report to the Pentagon by Marine technology expert Franz Gayl states that “casualties could have been reduced by half among Marines in Iraq if
specially armored vehicles had been deployed more quickly in some
cases.” Gayl found that if the mass procurement and fielding of Mine Resistant Ambush Protected vehicles had begun in 2005 in
response to the known and acknowledged threats at that time, as the
United States Marine Corp (USMC) is doing today, hundreds of deaths and injuries could have been
prevented.” What’s this got to do with “no secrets?” Well, apparently Gayl had previously made some pretty damning allegations around this very matter so the USMC gave him the opportunity, on government time, to prove his allegations. And apparently, that’s just what he’s done.
    Now combine this with the fact that David Walker, head of the Government Accounting Office since 1998 has resigned to become the head of a new $1 billion dollar private research firm. What is stunning about Walker’s resignation has been his very recent public appearances and statements regarding the “three sets of books” the U.S. government is keeping as well as his warnings that without radical changes to “business as usual” the U.S. economy is a train wreck in the making. Note that Walker was appointed and confirmed by George H.W. Bush, Bill Clinton and George Bush. Walker has no political ax to grind.
    These are two of many recent examples that support my belief that we
are moving into a phase of consciousness evolution where deception will be unmasked every time it’s tried.
    There is no longer time or place for behavior that will not support the highest good for all concerned. Even esoteric writings that have been the purview of a select few throughout history have begun to surface, becoming available for all who wish to know their content.
    All of these events, and more, are why I say “There are no secrets.”
    As for my second belief around the winds of change, what could be more obvious than the rapid ascent of Barack Obama (literally predicated upon the word “change” itself) and the simultaneous repudiation of the type of politics practiced by Hilary Clinton?
    While this phenomenon is intriguing, it’s critical that we look beyond the surface and see what it is that people are actually seeking.
    Yesterday, I was being interviewed by Carolyn Firestone of WBZ radio in Boston. Carolyn Hosts “Women’s Watch” and she asked me what I thought about all the despair that appears to be so widespread. My reply was that I am actually encouraged because I do not see despair any longer. What I now see is dissatisfaction. Dissatisfaction is a vast improvement over despair because despair is immobilizing. It is where we have been. But dissatisfaction has an active component that moves people to action. The very vocal clamoring for “change” that is in the air is, in fact, that active component.
    What we must stay conscious around, and present with, are the types of changes we seek and the means by which we intend to effect those choices. Change for change sake, without a conscious awareness of where we are, and where it is we wish to go, opens the door to a usurpation of our inherent power as individuals by those who wish to power over us. This has been our history. It will not be our future.
    Each of us needs to get our thoughts and our actions in alignment with our intentions and then commit to the tough work ahead that is necessary to manifest those goals.
    So, having looked at the news today I am heartened. We are on the right track. No more secrets and the winds of meaningful change.
    It’s a great day in America.

P.S.   Remember to click here to download my FREE e-book “TOO MANY SECRETS”
    

>     There are two stories headlining CNN’s homepage this afternoon that relate to drugs and depression. I am quite familiar with one of the stories and not surprised by the other. The first is a report by Michael Chernoff about Jordan Burnham, a seemingly well-rounded and high- performing high school senior in Pennsylvania who jumped nine stories from his family’s apartment in an attempted suicide. The other story is a report about recent findings by Harvard University that in 47 clinical trials, anti-depressants were no more effective than placebos, although those results were deliberately misreported by the drug companies performing them to physicians dispensing them to highlight the benefits of prescribing anti-depressants.
    I’m familiar with Jordan Burnham’s story because I live nearby and not too long ago spoke with the Philadelphia Inquirer reporter, Michael Vitez, who wrote extensively on Jordan’s story and who interviewed Jordan and his family as he was released from the hospital after 80 days of care and moved to a physical rehabilitation facility.
    These topics of depression, anti-depressants and attempted suicide are ones for which I have a particular sensitivity. I have personally experienced all of them in my lifetime.
    The Harvard report comes as no surprise to me. I have written before and expressed my feelings about the over-prescribed, and resulting, over-medicated Western world. What the Harvard report does is to give credibility to a fundamental truth which is that in most cases, the drugs are not needed.
    What is needed is not profitable to the pharmaceutical industry and others who have made trillions of dollars off of masking the root causes of so much of our illness and disease…both psychological as well as physiological.
    A truth is that we insist upon defying Nature, no to mention our own good sense, by trying to live at an impossible pace. We have thrown personal relationships and quality of life upon the sacrificial altar to paying homage to acquisition and, oftentimes, meaningless accomplishment.
    Having for the sake of having.
    Doing for the sake of doing.
    Trading inner guidance for other-based direction.
    Whether a flower, a fish, centipede or a human, it cannot be lacking in the fundamental and necessary conditions for growth without distorting and, ultimately,mutating the end product.
    In our case, humans are not designed to live at the rapid rate of speed at which advanced technology performs. But heaven knows, we keep trying. And what we sacrifice in our efforts is all that makes us uniquely and magnificently human.
    Such a sacrifice is painful.
    Hence, the dis-ease and the drugs.
    Dis-ease is the result of mis-alignment. It’s from being out of balance with our true nature. The easy way is to sedate or mask the symptoms, rather than deal with the root cause. Make no mistake about it, even medications that appear to cure dis-ease do not reach to the core of where that dis-ease first manifested. The “seed level” is in our thought forms which then move into our physical body. The real cure is the opposite path from medicating and sedating. The real cure is to get at those thoughts and patterns of thought that are in direct opposition to creating harmony within oneself and in relation to others.
    It’s a daunting task, I’ll give you that. And we’re far from fully understanding how it all works and even farther from mastering this approach so I’m not saying that if your child needs a transfusion you should help her or him change their thought forms and skip the transfusion.
    I am saying that the road to both understanding and mastering alternative ways to intentionally create illness, as opposed to creating dis-ease by default, necessarily leads us inward to an honest examination of our thoughts, our intentions and our priorities.
    Jordan Burnham survived the nine-story jump. Hopefully, as his body heals so will his trust and faith in himself. Hopefully, he will come to realize that all the accomplishments and all the accolades are not only meaningless but also detrimental if we are dong them for someone else’s vision of how life should be lived…rather than our own.
    As for the drug companies, they’re unlikely to voluntarily change as they are driven by greed. So, this change is up to us. We must turn down the quick and easy pills for the slower and more challenging route to self-awareness, integrity and congruence by living lives that truly reflect our inner selves rather than the conforming to the outer demands of others.
    I know we are on the cusp of making this change. I know it because dissatisfaction is everywhere. Not despair. Dissatisfaction. This is a very good sign.
    We have been asleep…a culturally drug-induced sleep. In the darkness of that sleep we have been co-opted. I see and hear more and more people awakening each day. Out of that darkness and into the light.
    If the awakened ones need a motto, might I suggest “Rise and Shine.”

P.S.   Remember to click here to download my FREE e-book “TOO MANY SECRETS”

>     Today was just too hectic to write my usual blog entry. Try as I did, everything conspired to get in the way of my sitting down to write. Since I always like to find the highest meaning in everything (as you regular readers are well aware) I thought I’d find one is how today went as well.     
    Many of us have a tendency to think that no matter how much we do, it’s never quite enough. We really don’t believe in “quality not quantity” or we’d often realize that we usually get things right the first time and in pretty short order when we trust our instincts. Trouble is, we second guess our instincts. That’s when we usually go astray and wind up putting way too much in to what turns out to be way too little.
    It’s late. My day has been long. I’m trusting that my instincts are right. Therefore, this is the message.
    Trust your instincts and keep it simple.
    That’s it. The whole entry.
    Nighty night…

   
    
P.S.  Remember to click here to download my FREE e-book “TOO MANY SECRETS”

>    The last question posed and answered last night in Austin, Texas by the Democratic contenders was for them to share how they had handled the most significant “crisis” of their lives. Hilary Clinton seemed to strike a cord when she explained that while she had clearly experienced many crises in her life, some quite public, these paled in comparison with the “suffering” that ordinary Americans routinely experience in their lives. As example, she cited a Veteran’s rehabilitation center in California. There, she said, she witnessed the filing in of single and double amputees, wheelchair bound and even gurney bound soldiers who were determined to hear she and Senator John McCain speak at a dedication.
    I think the cord Senator Clinton’s answer struck was that, in Life, there are no exceptions from suffering. Neither the rich nor the famous nor the powerful are able to escape the most fundamental characteristic of growth.
    Pain.
    Nor should we.
    I have a friend who likes to say,”No pain. No gain.” However, she always follows that up with,”To heal you have to feel.” She’s right. It’s the feeling part that we so often try to circumvent on our way to inner peace and it’s the absolutely unavoidable reality of Life.
    There is a difference between acknowledging suffering and wallowing in it. Each of us has a unique set of challenges in our lives and in order to move beyond them it is vital that we allow ourselves to feel the feelings that will necessarily accompany them. Acknowledging and experiencing the pain of growth can be a temporary challenge or it can be a state of mind we never move beyond. Like everything else in life, the choice is ours.
    I have often said that everyone’s suffering is the greatest because it’s theirs. And because that’s so, in a sense we are all equally challenged to learn this lesson.
    I do not speak in a vacuum or without empathy.
    I married at age 41 and, as a former divorce lawyer, thought it was a wise choice that would last this lifetime. Now, with a 14-year-old daughter, we are divorcing. I believe myself to be a mystic forever on the road to spiritual growth. Divorce certainly challenges that belief. Some days I am more gracious and spiritual than others to my soon-to-be ex-husband as we continue to live in the same house through this wrenching time. The challenge is to simultaneously feel the suffering associated with this loss while at the same time see the beauty of his Soul and what we have gifted each other on our individual journeys toward growth. Anyone who has ever been through a divorce knows the pain of which I speak and the magnitude of what I propose.
    Each day affords me the opportunity to either wallow in the suffering or transcend it by feeling the pain and then allowing myself to move beyond it. Every time I do just that, feel and allow movement, I experience a kind of peace and feel a kind of love that is new and wonderful.
    This new feeling holds the promise of healing.
    We are living through difficult times in almost every sector of our lives. It is a time of transition. There seems to be little relief from the pressures that accompany our transit. There was a time when I would have said,”I wish I knew the answer to relieve your suffering.” 
    What I will say today is that while I empathize with your suffering I would not want to relieve it but rather hope that you learn how to move through it, fully conscious.
    “To heal you have to feel.”
    I’m lucky to have such a wise friend.

P.S. Remember to click here to download my FREE e-book “TOO MANY SECRETS”

>     As I was reading
today of the allegations that John McCain not only had an improper
professional relationship with a lobbyist named Vicki Iseman, but may
also have had a romantic one with her as well, I couldn’t help notice
the uncanny resemblance between the photos of Ms. Iseman and McCain’s
wife, Vicki. The two women could truly be twins…which makes added
fodder for the rumors and suspicion mill.
    So, as a former
divorce lawyer, I started thinking about why people, whether married or
not, choose to betray the trust of a committed relationship by
surreptitiously seeking out some form of companionship with another?
    I have been married twice. Once, at age 23 for a year and then
again at age 41 until present. In between those marriages I had two
meaningful, longterm relationships, as well as practiced divorce law
for 13 years.
    I know a little about relationships.
    Actually, I know a lot.
    Most of us choose a partner by default rather than by design. By that I meant we choose unconsciously. No, I didn’t mean sub-consciously.  I meant un-consciously.
When we are unaware and unawakened as to who we are as whole and
complete beings in and of ourselves we are attracted to an “Other” who
fills in the blanks that are the result of our own lack of development
or who, by their presence, distracts us from the inner work we so
conveniently wish to ignore. This is choice by default and its doomed
to fail. Without an “awakening” by one or both parties to the neediness
underlying the relationship, there can be no real growth or
progress…just a lot of exhaustive running in place, so to speak.
    Without that “awakening” and the inevitable return to the inner
journey of completing oneself, the most frequent “cure” is to find, by
default, yet one more “Other” who fulfills the same role. Who’s
presence helps perpetuate the charade that change is occurring.
    This is why people go in search, unconsciously, for someone outside
their relationship. The relationship they are in was founded on shaky
ground and, at some point, they begin to feel the ground giving way.
    They are looking for firmer ground but are unwilling to “go the distance” it will take to get to higher ground.
    They will find a quick and convenient fix to stop the pain. The underlying dis-ease will,of course, continue to fester.
    The irony is that anyone we are in a close relationship with holds the potential for our highest good and maximum growth if only we are willing to awaken from the sleep of delusion and face the truth of who we are.
    Nature always holds answers for me. When I look at the intelligent
design of it in all Its’ beauty and wonder it’s a small leap for me to
conclude that a similar design exists within Human Nature.
    The people in our lives are there to provide the optimal conditions
and opportunities for us to awaken from unconscious choices and see
both the Other and Ourselves as we truly are…each innocent and loving
co-creators who hold within us the knowledge of the highest good for
all concerned.
    If it turns out that John McCain had an
extra-marital relationship with Vicki Iseman, then the only thing we
will know for sure is that he is in some way unconscious and unaware of
who he really is.
    You may or may not find that relevant to the position of Commander-in Chief.
    That’s beyond the scope of this blog.

P.S. Remember to click here to download my FREE e-book “TOO MANY SECRETS”

>     It’s difficult not to continue
to follow and comment upon Barack Obama’s remarkable rise to the top of
the Democratic Presidential nomination process. As I watched his speech
last night in Houston, Texas following his victory in Wisconsin, making
it 9 in a row, I was simultaneously captivated by both his delivery and
the crowd’s response.
    It goes without saying that Obama has
what it takes in the charisma department. He has presence, passion and
is gifted in the art of delivery. He is speaking the language of the
present to the hearts of the many. He uses the words “change” and
“hope” in ways that are credible.
    But we must stay alert,
because he is using those words, and others, in a way that also
satisfies a deep hunger within us, and hunger can run so deep and be so
pervasive as to consume good judgment.
    It’s not my intention to
say that he is disingenuous or manipulative when, by his words, he
rallies us to believe in the best of ourselves and our country. Words
are powerful fuel and fuel is needed to drive the engine of change. My
caution is not around his words but rather around our hunger. Because
if I hear him correctly, his is not just a condemnation of the way
things have been, nor a panacea that he alone possesses that will
change the present, but a call to ongoing commitment by each of us to
change the future by changing the way we prioritize, and the thereby
live, our lives.
    It is incumbent upon Obama to fully mean the
words he speaks and equally incumbent upon us to fully listen to all of
those words, not just the one’s that temporarily alleviate our hunger.
For the hunger runs deep and a snack will not cure it. The long-term
solution requires dedication, hard work and perseverance in remembering
that we are each responsible for self-nourishment. And while, in times
of lesser abundance, a helping hand can make the difference between
survival and extinction, it is but a temporary bridge to the place
where our reality is the product of how successfully we live our truth
and how fully we take on the responsibility to nourish and care first
for ourselves and then for those who for whatever reason, are truly
unable to care for themselves.
    Barack Obama cannot save us. He
can, if he is authentic, leads us in the path of righteousness as some
before him have done…although rarely have they been politicians. But
there is nothing wrong with rarity and a fisherman or a shepherd were
no more likely candidates.
    My job, and yours, is the more important one. We must listen to our hearts and not our stomachs. We must discern for ourselves,
without being swept up in the crowd’s momentum, whether this man…who
aspires to be the bearer of a profound and transformative
message…understands the gravity of his task and whether we,over time,
are willing to carry the majority of the weight of it for it is surely
too heavy for any one man.
    Coming from a place of truth with an
intention to prevail through both word and deed, there is nothing we
cannot do together.

P.S.   Remember to click here to get my FREE e-book download “TOO MANY SECRETS”

>     I grew up in suburban Philadelphia. There was, and still is, a restaurant in the historic section of the the city named “Bookbinders.” It is one of those places that tourists go to eat, but also a place my family and I frequented as well as I was growing up. Although both the food and the service were good, I dreaded dining there because as you were seated you had to pass by a large lobster tank filled with fresh lobsters. It was from that tank that you chose the specific lobster you wanted boiled alive as your entrée. A friend who knew me well back then said, “Carole, you’re the only person I know who can walk past a tank of lobsters and feel for their confinement.”
    My friend was right then and it’s still true today. It’s why I am a vegetarian and also why I cannot read the details of this past Sunday’s recall of 143 million pounds of beef processed and distributed nationally by Hallmark/Westland Meat Packing Company. When I got to the part of the article that began to outline the unashamed cruelty inflicted on the animals I couldn’t go on. It’s also why, today, driving in Center City Philadelphia and seeing a horse and buggy pulling smiling tourists around Constitution Center by a crippled and obviously pained horse, I cried.
    I don’t know what it is that makes humankind think it has been given heartless dominion over all other forms of life, but obviously something has. Whether it’s whaling to extinction, slaughtering elephants for their ivory tusks, or effectively torturing laboratory animals in the name of science, we have become arrogant about our relationship with, and responsibility to, all other living aspects of the planet.
    We make “progress” at the expense of our own capacity to empathize and sympathize. By so doing, we have over time hardened our hearts and set the stage for an ever descending spiral of indifference to pain and suffering that, perhaps, is not so unrelated to the proliferation of   violence we are now experiencing throughout the society at large. Which may, in fact, be the best proof going that what we do to others we ultimately assure we do to ourselves…for there is only One of Us.
    Nature is a gift as is Life itself. What we do with each is not only a statement about who we are, but also the way in which Source gets to experience Itself through Us. Do we really want to be the reason that the Beauty which created All That Is comes to know the intentional infliction of pain by one of It’s creations upon another? Is this who we really are?
    Coincidentally, I watched a wonderful movie tonight, Kate and Leopold. It’s a romantic comedy with Meg Ryan and Hugh Jackman that spans two centuries by finding a portal in time. Leopold is royalty from the 1800’s who accidentally lands in present-day Manhattan. Kate works for an ad agency and enlists Leopold, due to his charm and sincere delivery, to film a commercial for diet margarine. He does so until, on a break from filming, he tastes the product. Repulsed by it’s taste, he refuses to continue filming. Kate, panicked by the potential harm his refusal could do to her career, tries to convince him to just finish what he started. Leopold refuses on the grounds that he finds himself “peddling pond scum to an unsuspecting public.” Kate sees no conflict and Leopold is incredulous that she, knowing the product is awful, would still proceed with trying to convince people to buy it. He is a man who follows his heart regardless of what it costs him. In the end, it is what makes him so irresistible.
    Just as Leopold, each of us in our hearts knows that wanton disregard for the feelings and general welfare of living beings, regardless of their positioning on the evolutionary ladder, is wrong. Yet, each day we,just like Kate, ignore the shameful behavior all around us and by so doing, condone it.
    I don’t know the particulars of what Hallmark/Westland participated in and I do not need to. I hope they are put out of business, if not by criminal prosecution, then by the refusal of consumers to do business with them.
    After all, it is up to each One of Us to stand up for All of Us…and most notably for those who cannot stand for themselves.

P.S.   Remember to click here to download my FREE e-book “Too Many Secrets.”
    

>     As I write this entry there is news of yet another shooting spree at a University that has killed 5 and injured 17 others, with the gunman finally shooting himself. This time it’s Northern Illinois University. The murderer had two hand guns and a shot gun. Whenever I write following one of these tragic sprees I am tempted to pursue a line of thought that speaks to the issue of gun control. I never-the-less try and resist that urge as I think there are other issues of greater importance that underlie the degree of violence we are experiencing.
    Today I resist the urge yet again.
    What is of greater urgency is how we foster and enable violent behavior by the continued proliferation of violent media presentations combined with a lack of parental responsibility for monitoring our children’s exposure to it.
    Just this week there was a report on the results of studies done by the National Institute of Health (NIH), Kansas State University and Iowa State University finding that children who watch violent video games are more likely to exhibit violent behavior that children who do not. Repeated exposure to the violence normalizes the behavior. Well, I don’t know why any thinking person needs a study to get on that bandwagon but apparently, to many of us do.
    It shouldn’t take a scientist or sociologist to figure this one out. Watch an uplifting movie with a happy ending and you feel good. Watch a tragic movie with a sad ending and you feel bad. It isn’t a quantum leap to conclude that watching violence, repeatedly, is bad for the psyche leaving the viewer predisposed to violent behavior.
    And it’s not just the video games. It’s music, too. And TV. The Pittsburgh Gazette reported that one-third of popular songs condone or glamorize drug use. Rap, sure. But Country/Western came in second. Surprised?  Then you’re not listening because it’s out there for the children to hear and they do…everyday.
    This is not a Congressional issue. Nor a State’s Rights one, either. Nor is it for the schools to fix. This one is Ours. Yours and Mine. Each One of us needs to de-normalize violence as a socially acceptable way to respond. We need to be pro-active with our children…what they listen to and watch. We need to have the courage of our convictions and risk them not being happy with the limitations We impose. We need to model non-violent behavior and be vocal about our opposition to it as a viable way to resolve anything. We need to not purchase the products or patronize the vendors who distribute and promote products with violent, sexual and drug related content.
     Over time, we have abdicated this responsibility for expediency’s sake. When you give up power, there is always someone waiting nearby more than willing to assume it for you. Usually, what they have in mind is a far cry from what you intended. And before you know it, they have set the standard you find yourself living by, no matter how low.
     The good news is that I’ve made it easy for you to fix.
     See all the words in bold?  They’re the key to moving away from the present state of things and toward higher ground…where the air is cleaner. If you’re not up for the climb, know that the future holds more of the same. When that happens, you won’t be able to deny that you knew and turned a blind eye and a deaf ear. Although time is short, and the moment is now, you and I can still make a difference.
    Let’s.

P.S.   Remember to click here to download my FREE e-book
         “Too Many Secrets.”